Update (Which May or May Not Involve a Little Light-Hearted Swearing where Appropriate. Hi Friends! (My Mom's Okay with Swearing Now that We've Had the Conversation about How I'm Not Actually a Lady Anyway))

1. I went for a run. One whole Entire run. I'm totally going to be prepared for that 10K in September. For reals.

2. I got my wisdom teeth out. That was crazy and sleepy. And guess what, Oxycodone--the awesome narcotic that makes people feel all tingly-happy and hallucinatory? It just makes me sleepy. Hello Disappointment. Since it didn't make me high, Ima say that it's a new found low. But I learned that keeping a drug log is a great idea when you have to take drugs every three hours and the instructions even say wake yourself up and take the damn pain pills or there will be pain! lots of pain (in an Alan Tudck voice, no less). I also learned that the best food on a liquid diet is a sweet potato puree with enough butter to satisfy Paula Deen (followed closely by lime-flavored real fruit popsicles. (Thanks, Grandma.)) And. All that eating in bed means that I finally washed my sheets (No way!). Oh and I got to experience the second grossest thing of my whole-entire life: suctioning old food out of the sockets that once contained teeth (wait, when did I eat cottage cheese? GROSS! (you're happy I shared that fun little aspect of my wisdom teeth experience, right?)

3. I now go to bed when normal people wake up. It's 6 a.m. I haven't slept yet. I'll probably wake up around 2 p.m. tomorrow. (And they wonder why I can't make it to their silly 8 a.m. missionary correlation meeting when not going means 5 hours of sleep and going means 3). (And, seriously, no matter what anybody tells you this crazy bedtime has nothing to do with my new found Frontierville addiction or those geese who have been refusing to attract a fox for me to clobber for hours and hours now. I don't have a problem. Get off my back.)

4. Despite this very not adult behavior, I landed an adult job: teaching adjunct (which some claim is even more like prostitution than graduate instructorship. For realsies.) The real good news is that all three sections I'll be teaching are honors 150. So hopefully I won't be whining about my "Stupid Students" all the time because the Smart Students take the honors classes. Also they should freakin' thank me because they will be required to read this

and see this guy

perform.

They are freaking welcome in advance.

5. I don't actually have a contract for fall, but my roommate got a verbal confirmation. That'll keep me from being homeless, right? Right?! RIGHT?

6. This movie

is awesome.

But not as awesome as this movie

Seriously. Go see them if you haven't. Do it now. And tell Thor I love him. (Kenneth, stop freaking out. I love you too. O-M-G.)

7. No but seriously, the biggest sacrifice the Big Headed Kid and I are making to go on our missions is missing the chance to see this

and this

and this

in the theatre.

Yeah. I'm sad for us too. (And yes, those are all fan made posters.) A big ole you're welcome to "our" converts and God and ourselves (because we will actually probably benefit the most from our missions). I guess it'll be worth it since we'll see them all eventually probably. Sigh.

8. I will probably put in my papers next week if the bishop and stake president are ok with that and if I remember to voluntarily go get some shots. (Crapola. (which is not to be confused with Crayola.)) My availability date will be Jan 1 or Jan 15. It all depends on what I'm feeling on the day I finally submit the papers I filled out in June at some point.

9. I still haven't moved out of the carrels. This made me feel like a loser last week. This week it makes me feel really glad I don't have to do the JKB-Home-JKB move. I just have to do the JKB-JKB move as soon as they tell me which office I'll be sharing with one other person instead of 50 other people (though, really people, if it's the Duck I might just quit on the spot. That one has mood swings and now that I don't care what he thinks about me, I'll start saying stuff and one of us will get belligerent. I'm not saying it'll be me, but he's practically a passivist, so . . . ) (And they trust me to teach honors. That's funny.)

10. I did not exactly read the 1930s British Women's books I was supposed to. (My bad. I started like 2.) But I did read the Thursday Next series, and it rocks. And I read R.E.D. and hope to use it to blog about how everyone is wrong about adaptations unless they've studied adaptation theory (and seriously who does that?  . . . I mean . . . um . . . who does that outside of graduate school? Because that question offends fewer of my friends (i.e. audience)). I also started this

and was shocked by the bloody, gory violence. I have a pretty high threshold for such things, and I'm about five pages in. Just saying. . . . Maybe I should read The Road or All the Pretty Horses. . . or something not written by Cormac McCarthy.

To that end (etc.), I also started this

and it's great so far. And I read this

and it's FANTASTIC! So much better than the movie (which, ok fine, I need to watch again and then discuss in the fabled adaptation blogpost. Sigh. But I'm very serious when I say that the book definitely benefits by being more subtle, more symbolic, and by not being affiliated with Nicole Kidman or her crazy false nose in any way shape or form. I'm really just not buying this

Cunningham's Woolf is a lot closer to this

Just saying: someone missed the boat on the whole whimsical part of the suicidal lesbian author. Someone who thinks that British Ladies in Australia hit the dirt and whine until Wolverine agrees to drive their cattle across the Outback. Someone who is wrong about both these things, but does ok when she has to die of consumption, etc.)

11. Ok, it's 7 a.m. I really ought to go to bed now. My life freaking rocks! Wouldn't you say?

Sincerely,
Katie E.